Archive for March, 2010

It happens in the game, people slip

– Carlton Palmer. Actual quote in the halftime show.

Beckham… into Sheringham… and Solskjær has won it!

– Clive Tyldesley. That unforgettable night

Football is called Jogo Bonito because of its very split-second game-changing characteristics. Most other games have a degree of predictability, or a slightly lesser significance attached to individual/single moments of brilliance. In football, done at the right time, such moments can end  a game. This image, etched in every Manc’s memory and echoing in his head every time the video is played, is a brilliant example of such a game-ending moment. It’s like the crescendo in the 1812 Overture. It takes nothing away from the brilliance of the game, but it’s only at the crescendo that the spine truly tingles. Here come the cannons… (more…)


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Lighter’s Note : I am neither an Arsenal nor a Barcelona fan. However, I really cannot help myself.

5 hours. The football fan in me is salivating. In a country with out a live telecast of the La Liga, this one is special.

I wait with bated breath.

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Right, I’ve been ever so irresponsible the past week disappearing like this. All the emotional highs and lows of the season which saw my (and all other gooners’ basically) mental makeup oscillate between immense euphoria and utter devastation finally caught up with me. I really needed that breather. What better time to take it than immediately after a sucker-punch-in-the-nut-sack of a draw with Birmingham. The more regular amongst you readers might’ve wondered where our say on the entire issue was. Well, Felipe wrote a HUGE rant and then realized he probably was having a nervous breakdown himself and hit the delete button. No wait. That wasn’t it. Post Match Heat of the Game he called it.

So, this is it; the big game. (more…)

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I have been experiencing some extreme levels of mood swingings of late, courtesy of the club I follow. Infact, It was that day when Steve Bruce’s head rolled on to the pitch from the hands of a bewitched supporter and scored a goal against us. It was about that time the spate of injuries kicked off. One of the worst performances of our season at the Stadium of Light, which is why it was befitting of a thumping home win this time. And quite rightly we made sure Sunderland suffered like a black cat(oops, unintended!) being choked by the scruff of its neck.

Also now we know why Torres is just the best in the business of putting the ball behind the net (more…)

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Me used to be a angry young man
Me hiding me head in the sand
You gave me the word, I finally heard
I’m doing the best that I can

– Nani and Berba a la Lennon (John, not Aaron) and McCartney

Nani and Berba are simply like that Beatles song… Getting Better.

– Wiper, Canadian football pundit. And unwitting source of opening quote

Van der Sar: Making the contract extension count

 After Chelsea unexpectedly decimated Villa and Arsenal expectedly drew at Birmingham, the onus was right back on United going into Saturday’s away fixture at Bolton, one of the trickier ones in the run-in, and the first in a three-game week involving them, Bayern and Chelsea. (more…)

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Chelsea played Aston Villa in a fixture that was considered one amongst the many possible stumbling blocks in the Blues’ run in. The Chelsea starting line up did not feature Didier Drogba. Chelsea’s line up however, did feature

Frank Lampard.

In an unspecified year, Chelsea needed to go play Manchester United at Old Trafford. Being very bored and very sober, the Blues decide to send a one man squad of Frank Lampard to the game and decided that everyone else would go down to the pub instead. After around 45 minutes of old fashioned carousing, the Blues are gladdened to see a score line of Chelsea-1, United-0 when they turn on the TV at half time. And so it remains till stoppage time, when alas, United draw level and the match ends 1-1.

Smarting only slightly, the team call up Frank to congratulate him on his fine solo performance. Frank replies over the phone, “Solo performance, my pants! I got sent off in the 11th minute.”

– Chuck Norris on Frank James Lampard.

Frank Lampard is generally accused of being three things

  • Fat
  • A Scorer of Deflected Goals
  • Jesus H. Christ

On Saturday, Lampard showed without question that he is one of the best box-to-box mid-fielders in the world. Also, to most viewers who choose to watch television without the aid of fun house mirrors, Lampard showed that not only is he not fat, but also that I have nothing worthwhile to add to this clause of the current sentence.

Lampard may not be blessed with the oodles of raw natural talent of a Messi, a Ronaldo or a Zidane, but I’m ecstatic that Chelsea have in Frank, a mid-fielder whose off the ball movement in and around the box is just phenomenal. No wonder, he gets into so many goal scoring positions. You would also be hard pressed to find someone who is, and I don’t want to jinx this, as injury free as Lampard. And before you jump onto the deflected-goals band wagon, this will have you know that roughly 8% of his goals are off deflections. Just saying.


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A Tale of Two TV Shows.

Lighter’s Note : Let me start of by reminding all of you that Sunil Chhetri has officially signed for the Kansas City Wizards. Clearly, congratulations are in order and let me, on behalf of the entirety of BigFourZa and Sir Wilbur, say that this not only top quality but also first class news.

Chelsea played two games this week. The results were the kind that make Forrest Gump’s mother pat herself on the back and announce to no one in particular how amazingly accurate her analogies to boxes of chocolates are. They say a picture is worth a thousand words. What they don’t say is that a thousand pictures, at roughly twenty-five frames a second, are worth less than a minute of your favourite show. After all that build up, I’ll do the honourable thing and move right on to comparing the last two games to two shows I’ve spent large amounts of my free time on.

Chelsea play Blackburn. I watch Californication instead.

Chelsea drew with Blackburn with one goal scored at each end. The first half greatly resembled the first ten minutes of an average show of Californication; filled with entertainment goodness and with some great chances for the home team to score. The second half on the other hand, once again ala Californication, involved me having to watch a smallish man, with absolutely no level, score. Also, topless women would have gone a long way in making the second forty-five half as interesting as the first.

It’s tough to see either of them score


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