Maddy’s Note: Ladies and Gents and disgruntled commenters, Presenting Nickspinkboots, our latest Arsenal err correspondent. He claims he loves Arsene Wenger more than his Mom and worships that Goal Scoring machine of an Ivorian we have. He is quite satirical in his take on things and the reason I bring this up right here right now is because of the bashing the poor fellow has been taking in the comments section. So before the rest of you irreparably damage his sanity by calling him a Spud, let me stop you right there. He’s kidding. And hopefully, he’ll give us a lot more of these posts in the days to come.
Author’s Note: These stats are until June 18th because some Arsenal players have actually done something useful since I haven’t had a chance to update it since.
Following is a comprehensive list of the invaluable contributions made by some Arsenal players to the 2010 FIFA World Cup so far. In order to keep the length under control, I have left out unimportant stats like goals and assists in a few cases.
- Minutes on the pitch – 99
- Minutes spent making some useful contribution to the game – 7
- Minutes spent treating the pitch like Central Park – 62
- Minutes when I don’t know what he did because I didn’t notice him (like the defenders) – 30
- Goals scored – None
- Chip shots scored – None
- Chances of making the Arsenal starting line-up next season – None