Pomp and Glory

If you strained your ears hard enough, you probably would have heard Felipe’s rich baritone singing ‘We’re gonna win the League’ at Fratton Park last night (or early this morning in India). Yes, the man from the Emirates was spotted celebrating in a Hampshire pub after the game and you’ll have to put up with my take on the events that transpired on the pitch (and off it of course).

To paraphrase Job 1:21 (yes the same book of the King James best known sadly because of Tom Cruise (that scientologist Hollywood nut, not the guy next in line if something happens to Traore and Silvestre) and Mission Impossible)The lord taketh away but evidently the lord giveth also. He tooketh Theo, Denilson and Cesc for his latest Arsenal casualty list but also to even things out a bit gave us a fixture list where (including yesterday) in three successive games we play clubs mired deeply in crisis of some sort or the other.

Pompey allegedly received an IOU to the tune of £3.5m from Her Majesty Queen Elizabeth which fantastically enough for an English Premier League club’s standards (albeit dead last) they don’t have. Then again the fact that David James is their highest valued player at £127 (source RMEIPVI*) does put things in a different perspective. Avram Grant’s expression looks so much more apt now than at Moscow before a Champions League final. West Ham who we face in the F.A cup haven’t been doing too great either and Zola is surely under a lot of pressure. Someone who did lose his job leaving Bolton, who we face at the grove on the 6^th of January manager less though, was Gary Megson who wrote his own obituary when he slagged off Bolton fans in public. Not smart Gary. Megson’s loss though is Bolton’s gain as no tactics is more dangerous than a shitty tactician’s.

So kick off happened amidst chants of ‘Sack the board’ and ‘Kill the owners (assuming we find the right ones)’. I was perplexed to see that Theo wasn’t even on the bench until I read somewhere that he was crocked again. Couple of nods and I sat myself down to watch the Rambo Show. Apart from the third one from Ramsey, every other goal came about because of comical defending more than any real spectacular skills on our part. Don’t get me wrong, we still had to play extremely well to get to those positions but a better defense wouldn’t have let us score 4.  

Goal 1 – Prior to the Hull game, the last free kick I can remember us score off directly was a Kolo Toure pile driver early last season against Bolton at the grove. Now we have 3 in 3. Finally the boys have realized we are sufficiently skilled (indeed over qualified) to kick the ball, get it over the wall, get it down again past it, past the keeper and into the top corner without having to resort to a pointless layoff by Cesc to Denilson who thumps it into the wall each time. Useful realization; one that adds another dangerous facet to our game.

Goal 2 – It’s never a good idea to let your opponent perform training ground maneuvers inside your box, especially if your opponent is Arsenal. Steve Finnan gave Eduardo approximately an acre of space and three hours of time to decide it wasn’t a good idea to shoot and pass it to Ramsey instead who laid it off to Nasri who again had the same abount of time and space as Dudu to slot one in past the goalie. Though selling Finnan and buying Glen Johnson makes NO sense whatsoever Scousers.

Goal 4 – The very fact that the opposing Defensive Midfielder has the gall to attempt a pretty fancy footwork filled run into your penalty area must be depressing enough, but the fact that he is then left free to peel off and score off an unmarked header should be sufficient to contemplate suicide or retirement at the very least. Song who had a good day defensively added ‘can score goals’ to his impressive growing list of skill sets.

No I have not forgotten my counting. Yes it is two THREE and then four. 3 however was a thing of absolute beauty. He won the ball from Van den Borre, skipped past Adebayor err Piquione,   dragged the ball back to his left foot and sumptuously slammed one past Begovic and completed his revenge for Cardiff’s defeat to Pompey in the 2008 F.A Cup final. He clearly didn’t think it was too hard. His celebration seemed to say ‘Eh, All in a day’s work’  

It was regulation after that. Pass them to the death. Concede one cheaply to give the crown something to cheer about. Bring on Rosicky as a sub. Wait, What? Holy cow. Rosicky is back. My fears of another 18 month layoff after a regulation level 1 groin injury were unfounded. Thank god for small favors. But no, seriously, I love the guy. It is so good to have him back.

A month back we had suffered an embarrassing 3-0 loss to Chelsea leaving us 11 points adrift. Now on Wednesday we have the chance to close the gap to 1 point and go 1 clear of United.

“Chelsea is our biggest contender this season”

“It was really good we scored 5 past Wigan. Our goal difference is now 27, just 2 behind Chelsea”

You may then wonder what Berbatov and Rooney have been smoking when they said the above  respectively. Over confidence, shortsightedness and plain old stupidity is what they suffer from. Yes, Wayne you too, because in case you didn’t realize our GD is 30. Actually I’ll take over confidence over ‘It was 11 men against 11 boys any day’.

Oh and we’ve done a Torres in 19 games already. 51 goals and counting. A century anyone?

 

 * RMEIPVI – Real Madrid Extremely Inflated Player Value Index